reading-list # one

I've been inspired by Leslie's reading list and have decided to create my own. I'm still extremely busy (as I mentioned in my last post) and don't have too much time for independant reading, but I'm still excited about the little I'll be able to do.
Therefore:

Michel Foucault - What Is an Author? (finished 9/16)

school # seven

I think about writing in Fine Point Pen almost every day. There's so much that I wish to get out; so much that I need to put into writing to help me understand myself that it is hard not to think of the best vechicle I know of to do this.

Even with FPP in my thoughts I rarely find the time to post. I'm so overwhelmed in attempting to keep up with the organizations that i'm, in attempting to keep up with schoolwork and in attempting to keep myself sane in this ocean of dissonance, that I never seem to have enough time. These are all bad arguments for not posting. Unfortunately, they're all I've got.

I spend long periods of time fretting over the fact that I'm not the right leader for the College Republicans. I don't articulate the fundamentals of the Conservative Movement very well. I cannot put a positive spin on them in the Reaganesque way that past presidents have been able. I'm not eloquent. I'm horrible with grammar. I don't think before I speak. All of those things and plenty more.

But yet this duty is mine. I stood up and asked for it. I believe in the essental nature of a Republian Party on campus. I'm too conservative to live around here. And, I take the issues far too serious to brush off those who would take the opposing side. Simultenously, i'm not smart enough to defend against all those who would take me on.

My fellow Republican leaders on campus are quiet and repressed. Out of two meetings this semester, My Vice President and I are the only members of the leadership to have attended both. Quite frankly, I need help. I'm thinking of turning to some new recruits to help shoulder the load. I'm considering coming up with titles for them, and having them help closely with the party.

Beyond that, I really need to sort out a lot of my personality. There's a lot of character traits that I need to solve. I'm such a freakin' riddle, so knee-jerk and frustrated. I feel as if i've been spread thin.

school # six

It's September. Again. Finally. I'm so glad that I've made it this far. And, I'm so glad to be back at school. Things are entirely familiar and comfortable again, and so long as they stay the same for the next few years, i'll be able to put off any and all hard decisions. I've spent the last two nights intoxicated with Maureen, Molly, and Trent. I guess they're my drinking buddies. But, that isn't a dismissive thought. They can be really cool.

I'm listening to Bright Eyes's song If Winter Ends, but it doesn't really apply to anything. Summer is in that really odd phase of leaving before Fall has yet to come. I really wish that it wouldn't leave. The Winter's cold and depressing and lasts entirely too long. Weather-wise it's been a great summer in Ohio, better than almost any that I can think of. The summer was always better when I was younger.

I'd write about what's going on at school, but I don't feel like it. It takes up so much of my time. It can be fun, but I really just feel like a "role-player" rather than a sincere individual.